Skip a beat

My heart (wait, I still have one?) always skips a beat whenever someone goes online.

I’ve been using a private ym account for months–or was it years?– to talk to the only person added in that account. I’m not yet used to using my acad account for ym, although I’ve been using it lately for online group meetings for school and conversations with my Dad.

I guess I’ve been used to always having to wait for him to go online. I was used to being logged on for hours on end. I’m used to feeling a jolt when he goes online because I was waiting for that sound, or the message at the lower right corner of the screen, that sometimes doesn’t come.

I’m not used to seeing other people go online. I still feel my heart skip a beat. I still feel disappointed that it’s not him, although I shouldn’t really expect him to show. I’m not used to not waiting for him.

But one day, I will be.