Days Daze

July 29, 2010

I’m disappointed with “Paglilitis ni Andres Bonifacio.” First off, it’s “kay” (as in “Paglilitis kay Andres Bonifacio”) not “ni” because the literal translation of that will be: “Trial by Andres Bonifacio.” Second, what part of SHOW DON’T TELL don’t they understand? It’s a movie, not a novel (not that I’m saying that a novel should tell rather than show). It had so many words. Third, I really want to murder that narrator. Ugh. Utter waste of time and money.

And it ended at 10pm! Which means wala nang ikot jeep. Had to go the Philcoa way. Above all that, it was raining so hard and I’m half soaked—partida may payong pa ako niyan. Dala ko pa laptop ko; buti na lang nakalaptop bag ako.

And I wasn’t able to sleep well last night because I was stressed and depressed. My class was at 11:30 but I was prepared for school at around 9:30am. To think that I set my alarm at 10am.

What a stressful day.

But at least there were some good points today:

  • We were able to beat the deadline for ACLE
  • My Media Law report went smoothly because I think I was prepared enough— takot ko lang magisa sa klase. buti good mood naman siya kanina. I realize that I really like Law, though I’m intimidated by the sheer quantity of the readings. My report was just ONE case, and it was already around 40 pages. Sheesh.
  • Was able to attend my 6pm ACA meeting (despite my 4-7 class; we were let out early, as usual) and I scored some points there. Hahaha.
  • I finished the outline in around 30 minutes. The outline that I didn’t want to do, and was already thinking of cutting the class it was required in. Not my very best, but okay enough. Outline lang eh. I don’t think it’ll be graded. Besides, I won’t be able to sleep knowing that I needed to do something. And I just can’t miss class. How OC can I be?
10:22 PM 7/23 Mae, kumain ka ng breakfast, impt yun meal na yan
10:22 PM 7/23 humingi ka ng dagdag allowance kay Tita M sabihin mo sabi ko..
10:22 PM 7/23 hwag ka iinom ng soda….mag tubig ka lang

It’s so like my dad to forget the spelling of my name.

It’s also so like him to remind me to eat breakfast. Which I don’t. Wala nga akong oras.

It’s also so like him to give me what I want.

We were able to talk after so long. I didn’t want to talk to him. I dreaded receiving any e-mail from him. I dreaded seeing him online. I dreaded what bad news he’ll be bringing. I just feel bad every time I talk to him, so bad that I almost always cry after we talk. But that conversation was different. He brought great news. News that made me feel lighter than I’d ever been in a really long while.

My class starts at 11:30am on Fridays, and I woke up at around 9am that Friday to a lot of messages and missed calls. My Dad’s messages ranged from cheerfulness to concern to worry. My aunt even texted me asking if I was okay. I guessed that my Dad must’ve called her and asked her about me or something. He confirmed that he did.

I really dreaded receiving any message from him, but somehow that time was different. Or maybe that was because I just woke up and the over-analytical part of me hasn’t been started up just yet. I got up with a smile, partly from his “Buti pa yung mga kaibigan mo natetext mo at nai-e-mail” and partly from his obvious concern.

I went online, finally added him in the ym account that I’m using for my academic and org things (hence I’ll always be using it), and waited for him to go online. A few moments later, he did.

He was worried. He said he had been calling our phone and my phone, but no one’s answering. Gee, I wonder why I didn’t wake up from those calls? He told me what he always tell me when we talk: mag-message naman ako minsan, ipaalam ko naman sa kanya ang nangyayari sa akin, et cetera. And I reply what I always reply to him: I have nothing to say.


I just checked my other e-mail and he also had a message there: “magmessage ka naman para panatag ang loob ko dito.”

I’m not gonna cry. I’m not gonna cry.


I realize that the last message I left him was on Father’s Day. We didn’t even talk. I just logged in, left a message, logged out. I really didn’t want to talk to him. I had a lot going on and I didn’t want to feel depressed. Or I guess I just didn’t want to deal with it, not when I’m halfway across the world.

We talked about his great news. Then about my plans for coming back there. He said if ever I’ll be coming there in December, I’ll have to board three planes because there’s no direct flight from Manila to the State they’ll be moving to. I said, it’s okay if I don’t go home this December. Gahd, goodness knows I didn’t want to deal with connecting flights just yet.

Then he said, “parang tumaba ka.” as comment to my display photo.

I literally threw up my hands and shouted WHAT?! Of course he didn’t see or hear that, so I just typed “what!”

  • maye (7/23/2010 10:07:22 AM): eh 95 pounds na nga lang ako
  • Daddy (7/23/2010 10:07:46 AM): kaya nga …nakain ka pa ba?
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:07:50 AM): hindi na
  • Daddy (7/23/2010 10:08:06 AM): kaya pala puro buto ka na eh

Gee, thanks, Dad.

  • maye (7/23/2010 10:15:43 AM): ang mahal ng tuition ko. 21 units kasi nga tinatapos ko in 7 sems ang dapat eh 8 sems
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:16:01 AM): and maintaining CS standing
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:16:10 AM): ano bang premyo ko pag gumraduate ako ng cum laude?
  • Daddy (7/23/2010 10:16:26 AM): SABI KO SUMMA
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:16:31 AM): ano?!
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:16:39 AM): sabi niyo kaya pag MAGNA, may car
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:16:45 AM): eh paano pag cum laude lang?
  • Daddy (7/23/2010 10:17:06 AM): car pa rin na laruan
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:17:11 AM): anubayun
  • Daddy (7/23/2010 10:17:16 AM): punta ka sa hongkong
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:17:20 AM): anubayun
  • maye (7/23/2010 10:17:27 AM): eh nakapunta na nga ako sa us, tapos hongkong?

That started it.

maye (7/23/2010 10:19:26 AM): pwede na humingi ng phone?


I said I’ll look for a model that I want and I’ll tell him about it next time. It would’ve been okay at that, and I was already doing my little victory dance, when he asked if I still need the Sony videocam. I said, nah, I don’t need it anymore since I’m already done with the class I needed it for. And the thing that I’ve been suppressing for weeks now suddenly flooded my mind: DSLR!!!!

So I asked. And I said, kahit DSLR na lang, wag na yung phone because I still have my pathetic old phone, and I can always save up for a more decent one when I want to. Some part of me doesn’t want to because I’ve been traumatized by the ONE TIME BIG TIME loss of my everything: laptop, phone, debit card, IDs, my perfect wallet, cash—and I didn’t want to save up for something that might just be stolen again. Mas masakit pag pinag-ipunan tapos mawawala lang.

Rather than phone, DSLR na lang, dahil di hamak na mas mahal yun. And I said I’ll be taking a photojournalism class by next sem (should’ve been this sem, but I chose to take the critical theory class instead). So see, it’s purely academic. XP

So he asked what model I want and I… er. I don’t know. I have lots of friends who know digital SLRs, so I’m confident that I can get their opinion. I’m sure many of them will be happy to accompany me buy it.

Anyway, we struck up a bargain: I’ll need to produce good grades in order to get the DSLR. So that means that I’ll be getting the DSLR by November, after the grades are in. Fair enough. But I have a feeling that I can have it earlier. Haha.

In the meantime, I’ll be looking for a model I want, and I’ll be thinking if I’d want the DSLR to be bought there and sent through courier here (which I’m pretty apprehensive about), or if I’d just buy it here. My friends told me it’s better to buy it there. Hmm. My Dad hasn’t failed me when it comes to these things. I asked him to buy me a Nokia 6130 as a graduation gift back in high school, and he suddenly called me from Dubai to ask if I want a Nokia N70. Which eventually became my grad gift.

So by the time we finished bargaining, it’s late. But, the spoiled brat that I am, I was able to bring up my allowance. I said, it’s been a year since my allowance was increased. We weren’t able to discuss it since I had to log off to prepare for school.

And I check my ym account and there it was. “humingi ka ng dagdag allowance.” I love getting what I want. He didn’t specify how much, though. I guess that’ll be up to me. Hahaha. Yey.

I’m so glad.

I said i love you. It’s been a while since I said that with a light heart.

Things are falling into place.

Facebook stat last night:

And we were right. Jabidah Massacre was indeed the peg for REKRUT. It’s nice that some filmmakers are starting to use our rich history in their films. Lots of people don’t even know what Jabidah is. |On a related note, what a great night. :D

Make that great day to night. :D
Yeah, I knew it was Jabidah Massacre even before Danny Anonuevo told the audience about it. That’s the history geek part of me speaking. I ABSOLUTELY love Philippine History. Too bad not everyone appreciates it.
I was telling my friend who was sitting beside me at the Cine Adarna that the film seemed like it was the story of Jabidah Massacre that happened during the time of Marcos. But since there’s the principle of verification, I resolved to look for more clues in the film that will support my theory.
Some time later, my orgmate, who’s sitting beside the friend I was talking to, said that the film seemed familiar, like it was… “The Jabidah massacre?!”
We excitedly talked about it, with my friend in the middle looking amused, and we looked for more clues: the coins that are too big to be present day coins, the arms that are old models and are too low tech compared to the arms the military use today, and the uniform that looked like it was the Philippine Constabulary’s uniform.
I was holding on to the last clue that will confirm our theory: the lone survivor that lived to tell the tale.
The movie, however, didn’t end like the real story was. Oops. Spoilers stop here. :P
So my friend and I were talking about Jabidah as we were leaving the theater and I think my excitement moved him enough that he said he’ll google it to know more about it. While we were talking, we heard one of my orgmate’s orgmate (from Cineaste, the main organizer of the Cinemalaya) talking to an older man. My friend and I glanced at each other and silently confirmed what we both realized: that the old man was Danny Anonuevo! So I thought of asking him at the conference after the film showing and my friend said I really should. Alas, he answered my question and brought up Jabidah on the first question asked to him. So I said, okay, solved na ko. And that was that. Other things happened (such as the photoshoot of the past, present, and future of our org), but I think I’d better keep them in my memory rather than post them here. :P
Despite the fact that we were selling tickets for it, we really didn’t expect REKRUT to be anything much of a film, given that it was about military. I just loved the irony that the proceeds of the tickets we sold will go to people imprisoned by the military (Morong 43) when the film is about the military institution itself. But I am so glad it’s about Philippine History. Sure, the shots weren’t good, some scenes should’ve been cut because they don’t add much to the plot, and the acting really looked like acting, BUT STILL! That they used Philippine History as a peg for the film is more than enough to endear the film to me. Good job, Mr. Anonuevo. I hope more film makers will do what you did. Our country has a very rich culture and history, and artists should use it as their material. It’s not just about loving one’s own, but also about letting the Filipino audience know. I mean, how many among the audience know about Jabidah? Most of my orgmates don’t, and we already know a lot about our country’s history at that.
Last year I watched two films: Last Supper #3 and Dinig Sana Kita. This year I’ll be watching 4 films. Geez, dumodoble ba? What, next year, 8 na? Ang hirap pag marami kang orgmate na nagbebenta ng tickets. Segue: We had fun selling tickets last night! Sold out kami! Ang galing nila mangumbinsi. From “libreng kiss kay ganito” to “ako gagawa ng reaction paper niyo” to “libreng tickets” nasabi na, pero syempre pa-joke, and we didn’t even bring the prices down. 80 mula umpisa hanggang katapusan. Galing! :D
Next up: Paglilitis ni Bonifacio, another part of our history that really caught my attention. I just hope that the film will do it justice. I wonder where they’ll start the story… will it be the elections? Excited na ako. I have a meeting at 6pm on Wednesday, but I suppose I can leave earlier. SANA.
On a different note, welcome back to my blog! It’s been a while since I last wrote here. I don’t know if this’ll be followed with other posts, so I’m not going to say anything. :)